A CALL TO ACTION

THE NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION HOTLINE: 1-800-273-8255

I have wrote and erased a lot of first lines for this blog. Let me start by saying this is completely off topic of my blog but it may be the most important thing I write. This week a family that my wife knows lost their 16 year old daughter to suicide. Suicide is a silent assassin and does not discriminate against color, gender, age, etc. Suicide does not care how wealthy you are or if you are famous or if you are a regular every day person.

The statistics on suicide are alarming and we as a Nation have to act now. Suicide Prevention has to stop being a reactionary exercise it must become action and it must start early. I have quite a few thoughts so bear with me as I try to pose them in a readable fashion.

We have to start addressing the issue younger and younger. In August of this year a 9 year old boy committed suicide after being bullied for being gay. I don’t care about your feelings about gay, straight, whatever. This is not what this issue is about, this issue is about love and concern for our fellow human beings and what we are teaching our kids. If we hate our kids will learn to hate.

We have to arm our teachers with the ability to identify suicidal behaviors and indicators. In a classroom of 30 students and 1 teacher this is impossible so we have to address that issue first and foremost. While in the Army a large percentage of my time was dealing with Suicide Intervention and Prevention and every time we turned around there was a new warning sign to look out for. In reality the best way to see the warning signs of suicide is to know the people around you and know what normal looks like. If we can get our classrooms to a manageable size so that our teachers can identify normal behavior in their students then it will be a lot easier to identify abnormal behavior. When a student does have some abnormal behavior it does not always mean they are suicidal but it allows the teacher to watch them a little closer. Here are a few behaviors to watch out for:

Isolation

Change in attitude: Used to be happy now they are sad, used to be quite but now they talk all the time Change in eating habits: Change in mood:

In the Army we learned that behavior and triggers usually went together. Here are some of the key triggers or life changes that may cause a person to become suicidal. Remember not everyone who goes through these issues will be suicidal but if someone goes through this and starts to have abnormal behavior then it may be a warning indicator of suicide.

A major shift in home life / divorce, death of a relative, a family move, etc. A change in financial stability / loss of job, demotion, etc. A previous suicide attempt A family history of suicide or depression

It is also important to remember that just because something may not seem like a big deal to you, that does not mean it is not a big deal to that person.

Also here are some myths and facts about suicide:

The holidays are when the most suicides occur – MYTH Most suicidal people do not want to add any additional burden to their family so they wait until after the holidays to commit suicide

Men attempt suicide more than women – MYTH Women actually attempt it more but men have a higher success rate due to the fact that men usually use more extreme measures to attempt suicide.

Talking about suicide will give someone the idea – MYTH Talking openly and honestly about suicide may actually let that person know that they have other options.

Here are a few tips I have learned over the years: 1. Take every threat serious. 2. Do not ever tell the person they are crazy or they won’t do it. 3. Do not be afraid to ask the direct question. Remember asking a suicidal person if they are going to hurt themselves might get you a mixed answer because in their mind they are not hurting themselves they are making everything better. 4. If someone says that they are considering suicide; ask if they have a plan and the means to fulfill that plan. 5. Encourage that person to get help. Do everything within your power to get them help. It is better to lose a friend who is alive than to lose a friend because they died. 6. Love and Compassion are key. 7. Take every threat serious.

THE NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION HOTLINE: 1-800-273-8255

Lastly,

If you or someone you know is hurting please reach out for help. Call me, message me, I am hear and will always be here to listen. Do not be afraid to reach out for help or to help that person you know is struggling. Let those around you know that you care. Stopping school bullying begins at home and can be stopped. This epidemic needs to end. Parents put your foot down and start teaching your kids how to treat others. If you see someone being bullied step in and stand up. We have lost enough lives and we do not need to lose anymore.